(no subject)

[randomness]

Why is it that well-meaning people fail to understand when people have issues, even emotional landmines, about certain subjects, and still keep banging on about them.

Are they simply clueless? Do they not listen? Or is it that they say things so they can hear themselves talk? What?

Comments

[r-ness.livejournal.com]

Yah.

To be clear, I agree that both genders exhibit the behavior, but what I believe is gendered is who they exhibit it to. A man can much more easily shut down conversation he's uncomfortable with, even from a supervisor, so they don't see the behavior as often or for as long.

[meepodeekin.livejournal.com]

Ah, this is why I am going to write a self-help book for women about how to stand up for themselves. I've learned that "I really just don't want to talk about that" is remarkably effective.

[r-ness.livejournal.com]

You should definitely do that.

[digitalemur.livejournal.com]

I am slowly, slowly, learning that I _can_ say "I don't want to talk about that right now, thank you," with the warmness of manner that I value so much. I'm also learning that going ahead and doing that enables me to keep being the warm and personable kind of gal I like being, so ultimately I win for saying when I don't want to talk about something.

[meepodeekin.livejournal.com]

Eeexactly. I find that when I am strict with my kids from day one and they know the boundaries and know they are inflexible, it actually leaves me more room to be warm and motherly with them outside of class stuff.

[chaiya.livejournal.com]

For some reason, I spent years thinking that people wouldn't accept "I don't want to discuss this further" as a valid sentence.

A couple of years ago, I came across someone who said "Let's talk about something else!" in a joking manner, and people both laughed and changed the topic. I've been using that sentence ever since.

[meepodeekin.livejournal.com]

I had a friend in college who always said "I like ice cream! Chocolate is my favorite!" whenever a conversation became too awkward. It worked remarkably well.