(no subject)

[randomness]

Occasionally, I get really angry on behalf of some of my friends because of appearance privilege.

Here's what I mean: I have a number of friends who are really sweet, wonderful people. They often get treated badly, however, in part because they don't fit the societal definition of what people (women, particularly--most of them are women) should look like.

On the other hand, there are a few acquaintances who get away with truly obnoxious behavior because they're conventionally attractive. (I can't think of anyone who fits that description who is actually a friend, for the obvious reason that sufficiently obnoxious behavior tends to drive me away, even when I haven't been directly affected by it.)

There's not much I can do about it except try to be a good friend, but it still rankles.

Comments

[tyellas.livejournal.com]

I do know what you mean. -hugs- to you and your friends. This reminds me of an incident two years ago, and its two-years-later follow on:

I was spending some time with a physically attractive man, someone in the Johnny Depp line - it was an attempt at a relationship based on unusual-for-this-area compatible kink - and, feeling insecure, I asked, "Am I pretty enough for you?" He hemmed, and hawed, and said something along the lines of "Well, I'm here, aren't I?"

Two years later, we've been split up for, why, two years! And I caught up with him two nights ago. He's just turned 40, with all that implies, and is fretting about what to do next. He asked what I was up to relationship-wise. Thinking of a recent health crisis and the people who stood by me through it, and how lucky I was to have them, I said, "I've been focusing on my friends." He gazed at me as if I had uttered the secret to life itself.

Because I had.

[marith.livejournal.com]

That sounds like it was rather satisfying :)